Since my last post. I surrendered to me. To my feelings and my thoughts. I acknowledge it.
I don’t like me. It is one of these things that if you say to people they will tell you this is silly to thing that way and will try to convince you about all the good things about you. Your friends and family like you, and for them your thought of not liking you is silly. Because they see lots of good things.
It is one of these things you feel since you are a kid. You buried it inside you because you feel people and family and friends don’t want to hear it. Nobody can help you with it.
During the years I have let this feeling out, I talked to friends and family. Our conclusion was that I am not as bad as I think, that there are lots of good things on me. But you know, very deep inside I didn’t believe it. There was always this little me that told me otherwise.
I have tried positive affirmations. They help. But they are only brainwash. They work by repetition. I don’t believe it. I can pretend I do though and continue with my life. And sometimes by believing them good things happen. And your life changes.
I have the urge to write, to tell you all about it.
I am not special. I am not alone. And I want to help you.